I decided to write this post for two reasons:
- I miss..miss..and terribly miss being a kid; and
- The obvious..I am guilty of not writing for what feels like ages.
- FREEDOM OF SPEECH
If anyone of you reading this happens to be the human rights activist types please don’t take the sub-head literally. When I say freedom of speech I mean saying only politically correct things. When I was a kid I could talk all I wanted and sometimes even say the most horrible things and yet get away with them (are bhayi..bachche mann ke sache hote hain). If my parents did ever get upset with me for saying certain things, all I had to do was make a sad face- enough to melt their hearts :P.
- PURPOSE OF LIFE
Err..what exactly is that? I thought I was sent on this planet to eat, drink, sleep and make merry. But then soon I entered adulthood. Purpose of life translated to what it is for most of us. Get a job with a fat pay cheque and ace every household chore so that one fine day my prospective mother-in-law doesn’t pack me off back to my mai-ka (mother’s house..as I write this line my mind replays the scene of my grandma talking about me and my cousins to our mothers and saying “Ye ladkiyaan apni sasuraal mein humari naak katwaengi”). As of now I have been able to accomplish neither of these goals, so the purpose hangs in there like an elusive trophy.
- THE WORLD IS A STAGE..INDEED
Mr. Shakespeare, after all these years of hearing this famous statement given by you, it finally makes sense. The world is indeed a stage sir and the audience is anything but kind. You falter a bit and the critics will unleash their wrath on you. Having a bad hair day?? Brace yourself for all those judgemental looks. In contrast, as a kid I didn’t have to give a damn about how I dressed or how my hair looked because I was cute anyways (not being boisterous..it’s the case with all of us).
- MAKING MY PARENTS SMILE OFTEN
The little I would come from school and completing my homework was a sure shot way of putting a smile on the faces of my parents. They would praise me and the graph of my self-worth would touch the roof. But then I wonder what changed as I can certainly not bring my office work home. If at all I work beyond my office hours my mother will ask that if I am so indispensable for my company that if I took some time out for household chores the company would come crashing down (yes..no real breaks..I can’t afford to be seen around doing nothing, lead a ‘purposeful’ life or die). In such a case all I can do is respond with a blank look to pretend that I was engrossed in work and tuned out of everything else. There are times I feel like asking her..“Isn’t this a part of the purpose?” For some strange reason I feel making them smile is only getting harder these days.
Enough about the joys of childhood, let me talk about adulthood. These days it seems all about enduring the long metro rides to office every day, giving a co-passenger ‘the looks’ and hoping that she would realise that her weight is about to squeeze the life out of me and she should rather lean on to a non-living thing.
Amongst all this madness, there are times when I am able to steal some moments for myself (when my guilt inducing parents are not around). In these moments I wonder why it is so easy to find reasons to be grumpy about. I would love to be that kid again whose smile could calm people down even when they were about to blow their lids off. As a kid growing up, going to office and making money seemed like ultimate bliss, but today I think I should only let my parents do that.
Today I miss the careless smiles and uncluttered brain. Though adulthood is not really a punishment, but comparing it with childhood I can’t help but ask myself “Why the heck did I have to grow up at all?”